Mama Moment: Choose Your Battles (And what that does not mean in our home)

Mama Moment: Choose Your Battles (And what that does not mean in our home)

mm-choose battles

My 4-year-old daughter already has her own firm ideas about many things, including what she wants to wear on any given day.  I have no clue where she gets this from!  ;)

Truthfully, yes, I'm generally pretty opinionated.  I also was more of a perfectionist before I had children.  My husband disagrees, but ... well, I guess we agree to disagree on that one.

Today we experienced a perfect example in our home of the wise parenting advice of, "Choose your battles."  As my pre-Mama self, I wouldn't have been so lax about allowing my child to leave home dressed in very casual shorts and dress shoes.  But thankfully, I have come to the determination that in some situations, learning to choose your battles really is the better way to go.

Being a perfectionist can be rooted in some deeper issues, in my opinion.  I have come to realize that perfectionism, at least at its extreme levels, is probably not an indication of striking that healthy balance.

As a parent, I began to see that, in fact, there are just some situations that are not worth "battling" over.  When it boils down to it, there are some core values and issues that are absolutely no-compromise in raising my children.  But many things don't fall into that category.

Now, admittedly, today we were heading out to the library.  Had our destination been different, a place to which we normally dress nicer, the approach would have been somewhat different.  So choosing battles does not mean that my daughter always, every day, no matter where we are going wears whatever she sets in her little mind to wear.

But for me, going to the library did not necessitate a battle about attire.  It was not worth it to me to enter into a conflict over this.

If you as a parent were to feel differently, hey, that's okay.  I'm not here to judge you about how you parent, and as long as my children are healthy I hope you take that same approach in reading this today!

As mamas, we also may need to heed the advice of, "Choose your battles," in our own discussions about parenting.  But more on that another day ... !

What is a recent "Mama Moment" experience in your home of choosing your battles with your little ones?  Or are you completely against this parenting philosophy, and why?

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Shared at Titus 2sdays

14 responses

  1. My kids are older and there have definitely been times where I have needed to pick my battles with them. Sometimes it’s just not worth it.

  2. My 7 year old is very much into what she want’s to do and what she wants to wear and is very a determined little girl and when her mind is made up there’s no changing it with out a tantrum. Oh the age of 7 is all about picking battles with the little ones.

  3. I wish my husband would understand this. Not everything has to be a battle with the kids.
    Lesley recently posted…Crystal Digging KitMy Profile

  4. Choosing your battles is probably one of the most important parenting tips – and the only way to keep your sanity!
    Lois Alter Mark recently posted…currentlyMy Profile

  5. Yes. Choosing battles is what I’m constantly telling my husband when it comes to the kids. Drives me nuts he hasn’t picked this up yet!

  6. I do pick my battles with my kids. It is important to let them win sometimes: for their self esteem
    MyKidsGuide recently posted…Cool Easter Party Games For Teens & TweensMy Profile

  7. Pam

    The hardest part of parenting is learning when to pick your battles. Some things aren’t worth it- but it’s hard to know when to let things go sometimes!

    • Nothing about parenting is easy is it, Pam? lol … “hardest job you’ll ever love” was spot on.

  8. Pam

    Choose or pick my battles is one of my favorite sayings, and not only when it comes to parenting. It is really a good philosophy to live by and becomes easier to do as you grow older. Somethings are totally not worth the stress and I completely understand and agree with what you are saying.

  9. You’re right it’s important to pick the right battles. Raising kids takes a life time.
    Maureen @ A Debt Free Stress Free Life recently posted…Comparison Is The Thief of JoyMy Profile

  10. Sometimes it isn’t worth it to fight and argue. Definitely choose your battles!
    Amber NElson recently posted…Immune Support for the Busy LifestyleMy Profile

  11. Wouldn’t you know that right now my choosing of battles is similar and with my 21 month old son. He has two shirts that he will wear and it’s only those 2 SHIRTS… Drives me bananas… but as this post reminds me… Pick my battles. Looks as if I’ll be washing one tonight. 😉
    The Mid-Atlantic Foodie recently posted…The Happiest Hour at Dry 85 (Bourbon, Beer, Provisions)My Profile

    • Oh, no! That’s even worse! LOL …. my daughter is good about choosing from whatever is clean, thankfully! Perspective!! Haha

  12. I face this battle almost daily with my nine year old daughter. She and I differ greatly on what to wear when/where.
    Fariha (CanadianMomEh) recently posted…Wordless Wednesday: cabane à sucre with the kids #Quebec #culture #SugarShackMy Profile

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